Monday, December 1, 2008

My Kingdom For Some Histinex

I need some sweet, sweet Histinex. I am hurtin' for certain. This cough is working my abs enough to give me a six-pack. My head throbs every time I cough. My right lung feels like it's turning inside out. I'm jonesin' for my Histinex. Do you think that while I'm at the lab tomorrow giving a blood sample, somebody with prescription-writing powers can give me a scrip for my sweet, sweet Histinex? If I don't slip and actually say the words 'sweet, sweet Histinex'? Because the lab is right there in the doctor's office, and he's usually got a couple of nurse practitioners around who might have time to write one for me. Of course, they will have to send down for my chart to see if I'm a drug seeker. I've seen the big Amazon nurse practitioner deny a woman her vicodin. She was very polite about it, but reasonable. And I don't want vicodin. I want my sweet, sweet Histinex.

HH had the bright idea that I should try some of his cough medicine yesterday. I know it is nasty. I tried it a long time ago. He, like I, always gets the same kind. It is purple colored, and tastes like medicine, and has codeine in it. That demon elixir does not work for me. It stops the cough most of the time, but when I DO have to cough, nothing comes up, and it's like I can't get a breath to cough up some more nothing. My sweet, sweet Histinex lets me cough up stuff if I have to cough. And that darn nasty purple codeine stuff makes me a bit sleepy, but if I try to sleep, I have to cough. Cough up nothing, and barely get a breath. What's up with that? The Pony got a little bit of cough medicine that looked JUST LIKE HH's purple codeine stuff. I didn't read what it said on the bottle. The Pony could only take a half teaspoon. He had a bottle with about an inch of medicine in it. He only took it for 5 nights, along with his antibiotic. The Pony said if was nasty. I could not force him to take it for another night. We will go back to the Tylenol Cough Plus Cold if he needs more.

But all that does not help me get my sweet, sweet Histinex. If I wait until my regular appointment next week, I won't need it any more.

Unless this cough lasts for 6 weeks like the last one.

2 comments:

DeadpanAnn said...

I'm always afraid to ask for anything with a narcotic in it, even if I need it. I even felt funny asking for pain meds after having a major abdominal surgery that hurt like hell. For the record, I did ask. Every four hours on the nose. But I didn't take all of what they sent me home with, and I didn't take a refill even though it was offered. I don't wanna get labeled a drug seeker.

My mom can just call her doctor and ask for a refill on whatever she wants, and he gives it to her. BUT she's known that doctor and his family for many, many years. You need to trade in that Mayor for a doctor. :)

Good luck getting your sweet, sweet Histinex. Or just getting rid of your cough.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
The only thing I ask for is my sweet, sweet Histinex. Otherwise, I just take what is offered. Those 10 fake vicodin after my surgery THAT I WOKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF did not last long.

On the other hand, we just finished the last of some pain pill that HH got back in 2005 after his neck surgery. As HH says, "You never know when you might need them."

The doctor's office was swamped, so I asked the phlebotomist what my chances were of getting someone to write me a cough medicine prescription. She said not too good, as all doctors were triple deep in patients at 4:00, and the waiting room was still full. She said, "Do you just have a cough?" and I asked her if she wanted to hear it. She said no, that she could hear it in my voice, but I let go a gruff trifecta of wheezing, echoing coughs. She said I could call and leave a message for one of the nurses to call it in. Then she said she would give the nurse a note, but it might not get in until Wednesday. I said I would take my chances on that. She asked if I was allergic to anything, and I told her yes, ampicillin, and she didn't write anything down, so we will see what develops. I was sure to mention Histinex, but I mentally said the sweet, sweet part.