Saturday, August 30, 2008

Scatterbrain Saturday 8-30-08

I tried a new product from Save-A-Lot: Pizza Breadsticks. It's brought to us by Cole's, the company who gives us tasty frozen garlic Texas Toast. The Pizza Breadsticks? Not so much. I do not recommend them. They are all bread and no pizza. Not even tasty bread, either. It's kind of like styrofoam. And when I got to the end of one, still looking for the pizza, it sauced me. Yep. It squirted a watery red liquid, which I suppose was the 'pizza sauce', all over my shirt and forearm, much like a fat green tomato hornworm squirted poopy seedy juice all over HH when he pinched it to death with his thumb and index finger.

HH's $1500 car has issues. Who knew? ME! He drove it to work on Monday. He got the license on Tuesday. On Wednesday, the cruise control got stuck, or so he thought. I hate cruise control. It's the Devil's Handmaiden. HH had to turn off the car while cruising down the highway at probably 70 mph. He took some valve vacuum hose or something loose so it wouldn't happen again. Guess what? On Thursday, the car once again locked up at high speed, not even under the influence of demon cruise control, and wouldn't slow down. Once again, HH turned off the ignition while barreling down the highway. And my son thinks I am weird to turn off the car at a two-minute stoplight! Friday, the new car sat in the driveway. Last night, HH spent some quality time with it over in the BARn. He says he needs to get its computer brain examined. Then he'll know how to deal with its issues. Told you so, told you so, told you, told you, told you so! (says HM, doing the Grace Adler Told-You-So Dance).

The #1 son spent the morning hauling firewood down to the shanty for HH. According to HH, if there comes a big snow and the power goes off, I'll be glad we have all that wood down at the cabin. Never mind that we won't be able to get down to the cabin in a big snow. Or that HH bought a big honkin' generator for that very purpose.


Stewed Hamm said...

BarryO wants to be a Kennedy, eh... What did he do, go out and buy a '69 Oldsmobile and a snorkel mask?

What? What'd I say?

Hillbilly Mom said...

No, BObama wants to be the JFK kind of Kennedy, not the EMK kind. The adulterer, not the murderer.

And if he bought a snorkel mask, that would kind of imply that he might actually try to SAVE his date, instead of letting her asphyxiate when her air pocket could no longer supply her with oxygen.

Oops! There I do, letting my thoughts flow out my fingertips again.