Friday, August 22, 2008

Robbing Christmas To Pay Car

I called HH around 4:15 and told him to stop and get a Casey's pizza on his way home from work. At 5:00, HH called me and reported that he was sitting by the roadside at Two-Mile Hill because his Mercedes chose that moment to die. I think it was just planning on retiring, and something went horribly wrong, because HH said he was 'right next to the Old Folks Home'.

Anyhoo, HH called one of his buddies, the one who owns a towing company, to cart him and his Mercedes home. 1986 was not a very good year, apparently. Seeing as how HH was 20 miles up the road, it would hardly have helped for me to go pick him up, bring him home, hook up the trailer to the truck, and then go back and try to load that darned dead Mercedes on the shoulder of a divided highway in Friday evening rush hour. But I did appreciate HH calling me to consult about the tow. He knows who holds the purse strings.

Upon his arrival, HH reported that the tow cost him $100. I had guessed that much when he called me. Not being born yesterday, and onto the wicked ways of HH, I asked, "Did you get a receipt?" Actually, I just wanted to know, because HH paid cash. It's always good to get a receipt for cash. HH, being accustomed to my miserly ways, sighed and forked over the yellow slip. He fumbled it for a minute, unfolded it, and looked a bit surprised. He's not an Oscar-winning actor. "Huh. It cost me $80. It says 75, but the guy didn't have any change, so I gave him four twenties. Why'd you want to know if I got a receipt?"

Not only was HH going to gouge me for an extra 25 bucks...he was going to act all innocent when I sniffed out his plan. Gave him $5 because he didn't have change, indeed. As I've said, no need to send out the birth announcements today for my entrance into the world yesterday. HH thinks he's gotten away with bilking my grocery cash for $5. He doesn't realize that it's worth $5 to me to get into his head so he thinks twice about trying to con me the next time.

HH's current plan is to go buy a 'small' car tomorrow. A car in the $2000/3000 range. Instead of going to the financial institution for money like a normal person, HH asked, "Do you want me to take the money out of the safe? Then we can get money out of the S & L to pay it back." Um...he's robbing from my Christmas stash. HH thinks he can impress a car salesman by laying $2000 cash on the desk and saying, "Take it or leave it." HH, much like her students, did not pay attention to Mrs. Hillbilly Mom's lesson. The schoolin' she gave the salesman during the famous T-Hoe transaction.

Speaking of which...we got a refund from that car dealer yesterday for an overpayment on the loan payoff of the old LSUV when we brought precious T-Hoe into the Hillbilly family. Yep. $167.74. We're the Even Stevens. I'm expecting HH to lose a tire or something on the way to town for my pizza.

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