Sunday, April 12, 2009

Farmer H

HH brought home four cute little bunnies from the auction today. It had nothing to do with Easter. He also brought home 11 of the ugliest chickens you ever did see. I want to quarantine them in case they have bird flu.

The bunnies are about half-grown. We have three females (does) and one male (buck). See how well I know my Lagomorpha buddies? The male is white with black spots. The females are mostly white, with some black or gray spots on their ears, and one with kind of a gray stripe thingy down her back. HH bought them in separate cages. He put all the females into one cage for the night, and kept the male separate. I don't know why. His plan is to make lots of little bunnies and sell them at the auction. Or eat them.

The chickens look like Miss Prissy, she of the perpetual pining for her beau Foghorn Leghorn. They are dirty white with floppy red combs, not at all brown and black and speckled and shiny like our two roosters. Wouldn't you know it? HH has been trying to get eggs out of those two roosters for nigh on six months. He buys 11 chickens at the auction, and by the time he drives the ten miles home to the Mansion, he has three eggs rolling around in those cages.

I will not shed a tear if the dogs use those chickens as chew toys when HH lets them out to peck around the yard. I want pretty chickens, by cracky!

The Pony has already become attached to the new livestock. The #1 son is imagining them deep-fried.

4 comments:

Mommy Needs a Xanax said...

Rhode Island Reds. Those are the prettiest chickens, and friendly too. We had one named Red (creative, right?) who must've lived like 10 years, and she was the tamest animal I've ever seen.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
I think our roosters are Rhode Island Reds. I know the little one is, the one who has gender identity problems, because we got him from Basementia Buddy, and that's the kind of chickens she has.

The new hens are Leghorns. They are hideous.

Stewed Hamm said...

This is either a savagely brilliant plan, or an epic disaster waiting to happen. I'm almost afraid to find out how it ends.

Alternatively, it could just be that HH really doesn't understand how cockfighting works.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Stewitwillbeabloodbath,
HH is two Hs shy of 4H. He needs some rural kids to tell him how animals reproduce.

I am most worried about the bunnies. The sweet, SOFT bunnies. The dogs go crazy for them, seeing as how they eat about 3 wild rabbits a week.

One chicken has already been sacrificed to the dog-god.