Saturday, November 7, 2009

Our Distinguished Guest

Are you ready? Here's the story....of a Bennett Wallaby named Quigley...who was busy hopping all over Mrs. HM's room.

Yes, Quigley was our special guest on Thursday. His handler/daddy gave us a 50-minute info-packed look into Quigley's life. There are better pictures on the DVD the #1 son recorded, but this was quick, and was from his phone. Yes. I let all the students use their phones that hour to take photos of Quigley. Because really, when is the next time they're going to be that close to a Bennett Wallaby?

As you can see, Quigley was all decked out in his diaper. He's only 8 months old, you know. Still a bit of a baby, with a baby bottle for comfort if he needs it. He's lactose intolerant, though. So it's soy milk from The Devil's Playground. Not the Tasmanian Devil. But Quigley's roots are in Tasmania.

We learned that Missouri does not require any type of licensing to possess a little Quigley of your very own. He will set you back about $1300 to $1500, though. And you better know what you're getting into. He has to be taken away from his momma at a tender age, which may be 3 months if my memory serves me correctly. Then you have to bottle feed him every four hours. And he can't lie flat, because it messes up his insides, so you have to hang a laundry bag kind of contraption on your bed headboard so he can sleep on his back while hanging. It has to be where you sleep, because Quigley can't make noise, other than a hissing sound when he's upset, so you need him to be able to get up and hop on your head to tell you when he's hungry. He can travel around with you in a backpack, but don't let him get overheated or he can die, because he doesn't sweat, he only breathes hard, and his ears dissipate some heat. He needs shade to cool down, and a black backpack is not a good place to stash him.

Quigley likes salty snacks as treats, and when the six kids in his human daddy's family sit down on the couch with a bowl of popcorn, Quigley somersaults over the back of the couch and lands in the middle of it. He also likes to play that trick when the young daughter sets up her Holly Hobby village. He will chew on electrical cords if you don't watch him.

A Bennett Wallaby does not have an odor. The only time Quigley smells is when his diaper is full. He does not like wearing a diaper, and at home, he gets to run around stark naked in his pen. Within 30 minutes of losing the diaper, Quigley does not smell. He's a really good groomer. For a special treat when Quigley is out hopping around during non-profit lecturing tours, he gets a cheese puff every now and then. At home, he gets only 3 of them a day. Quigley loves him some cheese puffs! He holds one in his hands and munches away. In the photo, Quigley was on his second cheese puff, and it slipped out of his hands momentarily.

Quigley is growing up, and starting to feel his testosterone. When the speaking tour abates, Quigley is going to have a little operation. Then he won't try to box with people. He's not very good at it yet. He tried it twice in the classroom, and got a good scolding from his daddy. That scolding was in the form of getting picked up by his tail, held upright, and daddy's nose being placed right against Quigley's nose, and "NO!" spoken to him in no uncertain terms. That's the right way to pick him up--by the tail. If you pick him up under the arms, you can crush his ribs, and give him internal bleeding, and he'll die. That was the main rule: don't pick him up. Also, to scratch his ears instead of pet him. That's what happened to the two boxees. They petted Quigley on the shoulder. That must be asking for a fight in Wallaby language.

The visit was quite enlightening. I hope we can get Quigley and his daddy to come back every year. You would be amazed at the visitors entering Mrs. HM's classroom during the Quigley hour. Three cooks waltzed right in. Mr. Principal came in twice, but he's entitled, because it was payday, and it is his ship to command. Numerous students and assorted faculty and staff pressed their noses up against the door window. I had to keep the door closed so Quimby wouldn't get out and hop willy-nilly through the school.

So...the kangaroo in a backpack turned out to be a Bennett Wallaby. But who's complaining? Certainly not my students. How much cuter can you get than a wallaby in a diaper in a backpack? Eating a cheese puff, no less!


Stewed Hamm said...

A wallaby in a diaper in a backpack eating cheese puffs... this has all the makings of a hit kids book that will go on to be completely ruined by the movie version. Good luck with all that.

Wrod Verification: Falignom. A small town in Southwest Missouri, that is entirely populated by people with terrible lisps.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

I don't know that I would want to be a mama to one, sounds like a lot of work!

Chickadee said...

LOL. That little Wallaby is so cute I could hug him and put him in my pocket...except he's already in someone's pocket. :P

When I pulled the photo up one of my cats stopped and stared at the little 'roo for the longest time. Apparently the wallaby looks deeliscious. But I think my kitty would be disappointed to learn that the wallaby is a kicker and could fight back. :P

Hillbilly Mom said...

I will get right on that children's book. You'll get a mention in the foreword.

Falignom was named for a branch off the Fauntleroy family tree.

Exactly. And he said that Quigley hisses when he gets his diaper changed. I can't imagine trying to hold him down.

Quigley's daddy says that there are no natural predators for wallabies in Missouri. Some of them get loose and revert to the wild. Some have been sighted for a year or more after escape, but then the coyotes or other such predators get them.