Thursday, June 4, 2009

Welcome To Paradise

Yesterday, The Pony and I went to see UP. It was fantastic. I usually tolerate the kid movies, but this one was great. We took my mom along with us, and she says she would like to see it again. She has volunteered to take the #1 son when he returns from his basketball camp, but HH saw a commercial for UP, and declared, "That looks like a good movie." It made me cry. The movie, not HH's statement. That's not unusual, though, because even Barnyard made me cry, when that Sam Elliott bull died.

There's not much happening here at the Mansion. On the weekend, Farmer H made an amazing discovery...according to Farmer H. He came in the front door, carrying a red Solo cup. "I figured out how the chickens get the eggs out! This one is still soft, and it's pink." Well, la di freakin' EUREKA! Farmer H tried to shove it in my face, but I told him I had no desire to see it. And furthermore, I told him to heave it off the back porch. "No. It will be fine once I harden it up with some cold water."

That was something I did not like the sound of. (Unlike a good sentence ending with a preposition). We have been finding about 6 eggs per day. That's 42 eggs per week for those of you who are not Mabel. I don't need some discolored soft egg that might just be poisonous when we have a plethora of perfectly fine eggs to pick from. (Say it: preposition). Farmer H ran cold water in that cup for nigh on 5 minutes. "Huh." From that, I gathered that either the egg did not harden up, or it did not turn white. According to The Pony, Farmer H threw the egg off the back deck into the woods. And later, Farmer H told me, "Well, we've had our first brown egg." I'm not so sure. That hermaphroditic red hen who on some days is a rooster, according to Farmer H, because it does not crow, but has spurs, has never laid an egg. That I am aware of.

Hillmomba. Just one big millipede-infested, snakeskin covered, soft-pink-eggy paradise.

8 comments:

Chickadee said...

Ewww on the egg. I don't think I would have wanted to eat the egg even if it did harden up.

A co-worker saw UP and said she cried too. She told me the plot and why it made it sad. It sounds good but I don't want to cry. So I prolly won't go see it. LOL.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Chick,
Something was up with that egg.

Aside from brief episodes of tears... it's really a great movie. How can you resist the talking dogs?

Mommy Needs a Xanax said...

That doesn't sound like a chicken egg. It sounds more like a snake egg. They're soft. Chickens don't lay soft eggs. They squeeze the hard ones right out of their guess what? Chickenbutts.

That hillbilly brought a damn snake egg into your house. At least he threw it out.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
EWWWW! Farmer H was trying to feed me a snake egg! Why can't I have a husband like Jon Gosselin?

Mommy Needs a Xanax said...

I think I'd rather just eat a snake egg.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
Snakes are full of protein. Jon Gosselin is full of something else.

The Pony reports that HE found that egg first. It was on the floor of the chicken coop, and when he picked it up, he put it right down, because, "Its sides squished in with my fingers."

At first, Farmer H tried to tell me that he ate that egg and it was good. Upon further interrogation, he replied that it never did harden in the cold water, and he put it in a dog dish, but he thinks a coon ate it. Or else it hatched and is planning to leave him a big ol' skin down at his MiniMansion.

Marshamarshamarsha said...

Good grief, I hope it is not a snake egg. Yuck.
I cried all the way through UP also, and when Sam Elliott was killed, I just wanted to leave the movie! Killing Sam Elliott off is just sick and wrong.

Hillbilly Mom said...

TriMarsha,
Where you been, gal? Nothing like kid movies to make the adults cry.