Monday, June 9, 2008

Hillbilly Mom's Greatest Hits

This week is going to be dedicated to ME. I am bring you my greatest hits from the last four blogs. Don't get all excited. Greatest hits from Hillbilly Mom ain't nothin' to write home about. The Hammster's comments yesterday mentioned 'The Shootist', which is also a John Wayne movie, and in a roundabout way, it reminded me of THIS post from 2005:


Saturday, August 27, 2005

The Famous Author

Hillbilly Husband is in Connecticut to fix a machine and visit with his company's big boss. He called tonight to check in. It went a little something like this:

I'm at the bottom of Connecticut. You know, that little part that sticks out? I am overlooking the New England Sound. I can see across to the lights of New York, and what's that island just off
of New York?

You mean Manhattan?

Yeah, I guess. The place where everybody goes for the summer.

No, that would be the Hamptons. Long Island.

Yeah, whatever. My boss lives two doors down from some famous author lady. Betty something. I can't think of it now. mean like famous for her writing now? Or did she write classic literature? Or poetry? How old is she? Does she live by him, or just her house is by his?

She just died. I think she was born in the 1930s.

You're not giving me much to go on.

I know. I don't know that kind of stuff. I'll have to ask him again.

Thirty minutes later #2 son answered the phone. Hey, Dad is back at his motel.

Ask him about that author lady.

Oh. Mom, it was Katherine Hepburn.

Only at my house, people, is Katherine Hepburn best known for her writing. And her nickname, "Betty." Nice of HH to shave 30 years off her age, because she was born in 1903. And only at my house does "just died" mean 2 years ago she died.

We won't even get into our geography issues.


  • At 10:40 PM, Blogger deadpanann said…

    I find myself saying that something "just" happened when it's been a while. But I guess I'd like to think that when I die it will take more than 2 years before it's exactly as if I had never existed.

    God I'm depressed.

  • At 12:07 PM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    I waited until today to tell HH that he was looking out across "Long Island Sound," not "New England Sound."

    I am geographically challenged, but not to his extent.

  • At 3:27 PM, Blogger Babs said…

    LOL!!! Katherine Hepburn as an author! Too many funnies in one post to even mention; but that one threw me for an unexpected loop!

  • At 3:59 PM, Blogger KarbonKountyMoos said…

    HH isn't doing bad geographically. I "grew up" (to a point) on Longuyland. Well, in Astoria, Queens. It always amazed me that folks in Queens & Brooklyn would say, "We're going out to the island."
    You're already on "the island" - knuckleheads - you're going east...

    And here I thought that Katherine Hepburn was a famous dancer. Oh, maybe that was Audrey.

  • At 4:15 PM, Blogger Redneck Diva said…

    Good ol' Betty...those were some great books she wrote just awhile back.

  • At 6:53 PM, Blogger Rebecca said…

    Hi Hillbilly Mom,
    I've just discovered your site, looks great. I found it by googling "Unknown famous authors who don't know where they lived."

  • At 7:06 PM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    He got back today, and told me that he drove out onto the causeway, which is "just like a big low-water bridge." I guess you can take the redneck out of Missouri, but you can't take the Missouri out of the redneck.

    But have you been to "New England Sound?"

    HH is not book-friendly. He wouldn't read a book on a$$-biting if it bit him in the a$$. OK, so maybe that's not a very good example.

  • At 7:09 PM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    I guess you think you're clever, sneaking in while I was busy responding to others. There's one of you in every crowd. Me me me! Stop talking to them and talk to me!

    Are you sure you weren't googling "world class car-singers?"


There. That should satisfy you until tomorrow.


Hillbilly Mom said...

I really did have a comment here. Funny seems that there is a big button that says REJECT right beside the one that says PUBLISH on the Moderate Comments page thingy. And once a comment has been 'moderated', you can't get it back unless you go into your email trash. So I offer you my rendition of the lost comments:

Mon, Jun 9, 2008 at 11:00 PM
DeadpanAnn has left a new comment on your post "Hillbilly Mom's Greatest Hits":

I was trying to figure out why I said I was depressed, then realized that was a few weeks after I moved to Yazoo Shitty.

Mon, Jun 9, 2008 at 11:01 PM
DeadpanAnn has left a new comment on your post "Hillbilly Mom's Greatest Hits":

Ahhh those were the days.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
I think that was the place where you shared your recipe for 'Not Really Chili'.

Yes, those WERE the days, my friend. How time flies.

Life is what happens while you're making plans. That's what Sheryl Crow says, anyway.

Stewed Hamm said...

I try not to take advice from a woman who worries so much about what other people do on the crapper.

Word Verification: "immauh" What Pauh's wife says when you ask what her name is.

Hillbilly Mom said...

In Ms. Crow's defense, she DID say later that she was really joking. I take her at her word.

I can't believe that a fellow Missouri gal would care so much about the environment. When she left her job as a music teacher to become rich and famous, did she plant a forest around Kennett to replace all the trees being used for toilet paper and napkins? NO. She built the town a swimming pool. Perhaps to wash the hands and butts.

Why would she think about conserving paper? Are Missourians known for their excess use of paper napkins? For their scrupulously wiped butts? I think not. In fact, Missourians are actually helping the world, by wiping their hands on their jeans, and by using pages from catalogs to wipe their butts. We were quite sorry to hear of the demise of the Sears Catalog.

Methinks Miss Sheryl's success has gone to her head.