On the daily ride home from school, I share snippets of my day with my muppets. Sometimes I leave out the names to protect the guilty, but I relate some of the outrageous incidents to them. Like the day my thermostat was magically reset four degrees by an errant quarter.
Thursday, I told them that somebody complained of a 3-page paper cut. The #1 son found that to be quite humorous.
Since it was HH's bowling night, it was fast-food night for the kids. The Pony loves him some Papa John's cheese pizza. We picked that up for him, along with a bottle of Sprite, since he is not allowed caffeine. The #1 son wanted Burger King, which is just down the road and on the way home. Last week, they both had Burger King, and The Pony had an Oreo Sundae Shake. He gave me the dregs, which I found quite tasty. I decided to have one for myself.
Have you ever had one of those Oreo Sundae Shakes from Burger King? They give you this ginormous straw thingy that is blue hard plastic, and its wrapper labels it as 'The Pipe.' Finding that a bit strange, I took to calling it the crack pipe. As we were waiting at the stop light to cross into Burger Kingdom, the #1 son and I were talking about how he's going to be in my class next year. He says I am not allowed to talk about him, and I say that I expect him to behave. It's a balancing act. If he doesn't behave, I can tell a story about him, and if I tell a story about him, he will misbehave. Checks and balances. We're a regular O. Henry story waiting to happen.
Anyhoo...he said I wasn't allowed to talk about a certain subject, and I said, "And you WILL NOT mention my crack pipe!" The Pony, sitting behind me, started to splutter Sprite. He choked a bit, though I'm not sure if it came out his nose, or just got sucked into his trachea momentarily.
Which led me to declare: "Apparently, laughter is not always the best medicine."
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The NEW home of the OH SO PRETTY Hillbilly Mom, nestled in the heart of DoNotLand, where the Gummi Mary appeared on a plate of melted Gummi Bears and was unceremoniously half-devoured by a DoNot, and dumped in the wastebasket. The excitement of that day was rivaled only by the New Year's Day trip to Save-A-Lot, where a woman followed Mrs. Hillbilly Mom, stroked her arm, asked if she was married, and declared, "You are SO PRETTY."
About Me
- Hillbilly Mom
- I am old, and have 2 young kids and an old husband. My days are pretty full just annoying them.
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6 comments:
I have not had an Oreo sundae from Burger King, but I have had a midnight truffle blizzard from Dairy Queen, and it was the finest thing I've tasted in some time. The Burger King in our town got closed down. Apparently they used a very small hurricane as an excuse to not open up for several days, and someone from higher up in the company came and just shut them down for being idiots. It's just as well. They never did any business anyway, and every time you drove by you'd see all the employees standing outside smoking.
Miss Ann,
Our Dairy Queen gave a little girl E. coli. It's still open.
You've got to find a Burger King to try that Oreo Sundae Shake. Just for the crack pipe. The shake itself is not very good. It's like all vanilla shake, with a few Oreo crumbs, some whipped cream, and some chocolate syrup. If you just take the last couple of inches from somebody else's shake, it's really good.
OMG you're going to have good stories next year to blog about with the boy in your class. You know you are. :P
Chick,
I know. Today after school, he was squatting on his feet in one of my chairs. I told him that was not going to happen next year. He said, "Oh, I never do that in class. But I can do this." He then left his feet in the seat, and sat his butt on the back of the chair.
I don't think so.
You're about to make some nice young therapist very very wealthy.
StewhaveyoutriedtheBKsundaeshake?
The damage has already been done.
Put THAT in your crack pipe and smoke it!
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