All week we presented Science Projects. One by one, two by two, students stood in front of the class with their magnificent creations, spouting scientifica to Mrs. HM's content. Friday, the unflappable Mrs. HM flapped. A never-before heard sentence was uttered.
"I took a piece of waxed paper outside and rubbed it on my goat."
Mind you, this was an experiment about capturing electricity in a jar. These kids had a great diagram, and explained everything well. When I asked how they got the static electricity that they eventually captured in a jar, that was the answer I got. "I took a piece of waxed paper outside and rubbed it on my goat."
I thought it was a joke. "No. Really. How did you get the static?"
I'm telling the truth. I rubbed waxed paper on my goat.
What kind of goat do you have?
I have a white goat and a black goat.
Which one did you rub the waxed paper on?
The white goat.
Why did you pick the white goat. Was it because the other one was BLACK?
I picked the white goat because the black goat isn't right. He jumps all around.
How many legs does your goat have?
My goat has all four legs.
(A kid in that class told a substitute one time that he had a pet goat, and that it stepped in a hole and had to have a leg amputated. Then later that summer, his dad ran over another leg with the lawnmower because the three-legged goat couldn't get out of the way in time. Next thing you know, a dog attacked the goat and ripped off one of the two remaining legs. Now he has a goat that has to reach out with its one leg and drag itself forward. He never really had a goat, but the story took all hour, and the sub believed him.)
How long did you rub the waxed paper on the goat?
Thirty seconds.
Did he mind?
No.
In your procedure, does it say to rub waxed paper on a goat?
No. It says to rub an acrylic sheet with wool, but we didn't have an acrylic sheet or wool, so we used the closest things we had, which was waxed paper and a goat. It worked.
Like HM always says...nobody can make the environment work for him like a Hillbilly.
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3 comments:
Some Dept. of Energy poindexter will be knocking this kid's door down ready to throw billions of dollars in grants for his new goat-based energy source.
Sounds like an A to me.
Stewheresthecatch,
The kid will be forced to include the black goat in his quest for affordable goat-electricity, even though the black goat has proven unpredictable. Political correctness means never having to be goat-energy-efficient.
Miss Ann,
Excellence in gradage was achieved.
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