Now You Read Me, Now You Don't

I'm not really here tonight. I am at The Pony's band instrument extravaganza. So I will time shift and tell you a little about yesterday.

We left right after school, as soon as legally allowed, making sure we waited until The Pony arrived on the bus from Basementia. For the last two years, I have been accustomed to staying after school to finish my grading and run copies and finish all the other odds and ends that pop up throughout the day. This year, I have tried to hurry through that minutia and take a 30-minute walk in the hallowed halls of Newmentia. Mabel and I used to do so several years ago, before she got all hoity-toity and joined a gym. I don't hold it against you, Mabel. Different strokes for different folks.

The problem this year seems to stem from my desk. I moved it from the front of the room over to the space between the windows that face out front. You wouldn't think that would matter one iota. But it does. People used to walk past the door, look in at me, and keep walking. Now, they look in, I look up, and in they traipse, ready to suck the time right out of me. It's odd, really. #1 says that to the person in the hall, it looks like I am waving my hand, saying, "Come on in." I don't think so.

The only invited guest was Mabel herself. Others just assumed that I was there to shoot the breeze with them. Or entertain them. One day, I didn't get my walking shoes on until 4:30. That's too late, people. I might as well live there. In the span of three days, my visitors included: ScienceBuddy, Arch Nemesis, NotACook, ArtsyFartsy, Custodial-D, Mr. A$$hole(that's not his name or personality, just what it sounds like over the intercom), AuntieJ, and one of #1's cronies. The cronies are not allowed in my room. Mostly, they go to the computer lab. See, I'm real good at sending them to someone else's room. But on this day, the crony who was not allowed in my room was there for 45 minutes. I can't get anything done like that. In addition, I told him I was ready to change my shoes, and wanted some privacy. The boys thought I was joking. I was not.

Anyhoo, we escaped by 3:15 yesterday, so that I could walk at home and #1 could practice basketball and I could do my little bit of schoolwork in my basement lair. Oh, I walked around my porch all right. In the 80 degree heat that was like an oven on the front porch, and merely like the back burner on the shaded back porch. #1, on the other hand, promptly called one of his old teachers to offer her his iPhone for $350, even though I told him not to, because he currently has an auction on eBay for it with a Buy It Now for $500, and also because it's not teacher payday until September 5, which means that teachers have been living on their bundle of summer checks since June 5, and it's doubtful that anybody has a spare $350 just laying around. So there was no practicing of basketball until 5:00 anyway, and I got all heated up, and didn't want to do that brung-home schooly stuff.

At least people did not invite themselves in like I was some freakish stationary Welcome Wagon.